I have no idea what I’m doing. A few months ago, I thought I had my life preplanned and figured out. Now, one night of passion and I’m suddenly a father of twins. Who the hell knows where Becky went. Her cell phone is cut off and she could be in New York or LA or fucking Siberia for all I know. Who does this? Who just leaves their two kids on someone’s doorstep?
And why did she pick Diego and Antonio? I mean, yeah they’re fine names, but they’re the equivalent of calling your children Anthony and James. I would’ve pushed for something more unique, but here we are, I guess. These two little babies that want nothing to do more than sleep all day and keep me awake all night. When it feels like it’s getting annoying or I can’t handle it, I look into their eyes and something stirs in the pit of my soul and it stops being a chore and just becomes…. Joy.
I didn’t know that they’d already have their own personalities so early. Diego seems to be attracted to anything that’s red while Antonio seems to just stick with blue things. Diego’s quiet and doesn’t fuss much, Antonio is just a chatterbox who is always wanting attention. So little, so young, and yet so very different already.
I can already see myself in them, but I also see Becky. They both have her green eyes. They have my skin tone, mostly. I just hope neither of them have her mentality. I’m gonna have to teach them to finish what they start, to always make the right decision, to always own up to their responsibilities no matter what.
Fuck, it pisses me off she just dumped them and left. How could she?! I hold them in my arms and it’s….it’s like I’m instantly addicted to them. They coo and babble and I just melt. I feel their little heartbeats next to mine and I’m blown away by it all. They’re so little. They’re so gentle. They’re so helpless. And they have me tied around their little fingers already.
But it’s also really taxing, too. Between work and training, the boys what what they want when they want it… I’m just all over the place and I’m definitely not getting enough sleep.
After hiring a sitter, I went down to the Paw and sat at the bar. I had a root beer float and started chatting with the bartender. Found out her name is Nina Caliente. She’s a nice lady. She gave me another float on the house because she said that I looked tired. Then after her early shift, she talked with me outside.
“What those two boys need is a mother,” Nina said. “What about their real mother?”
I just sighed heavily and she nodded.
“Some people just ain’t built for it,” she said. “You look like you could handle it, though.”
“I’m trying, but I wasn’t ready for twins,” I said. “One would’ve been hard enough to raise alone, but two? They both want something at the same time, but one wants the bottle while the other wants attention and I try to do what I can, but I feel that I’m….. not enough.”
Look, you’re going to be enough for those boys, you’ll see, sugar. You’re never gonna feel like you’re enough. My mama taught me that. But, I can tell you that you will be. You will be their world, Sergio. And they will love you for it forever…. Even if they seem to give you a hard time about it like me and my sister did to our mama. Boy, I could tell you some stories.”
I chuckled slightly, “Hey, you wanna see a picture?”
“Sure, sugar,” Nina said.
I took out my phone and showed her. Suddenly there came this high-pitched squeal from her that I didn’t think any human could make.
“Well I’ll be golldanged, Sergio. Those are some cute kids you got there? What’s their names again?”
“That’s Diego,” I said. “And that’s Antonio.” As I said those words, I could feel the smile on my lips pushing as far wide as it could go and still trying to spread further.
“I’ll give ya my number and if you need a night off or just want some help, you give me a call, sugar,” Nina said. “Since my sister got up with Don Lothario, I’m just all kinds of trying to get out of that house. He’s kind of a pig. Anyway, that’s none of your concern.”
“I… I can’t impose like that, Nina,” I said.
“Impose?” She said, “Well, I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t wanna. Now you just take my number down and give me a call and I’ll come over and help ya if you need it. Nina Caliente is on the case, sugar!”
She sure was in a hurry to meet the boys. She called me the next day asking to see the kids. I kept them in my room, so I showed her upstairs and the first thing she did was take Antonio and give him a bottle, then did the same for Diego. She even changed dirty diapers. She was a red-headed angel helping me out. I guess from her own experience, she was familiar with the stress a single parent can have and just felt sorry for this poor guy who was in way over his head.
“Like I said, sugar, anytime!” Nina said.
As the days went on, she came over a few times to help out while I needed to train for the team or go to the store. She didn’t seem to mind at all. In fact, it was kind of nice having her around helping. I watched her with the boys and she seemed just like a natural. And, I don’t know how or why I began to think about this, but I got the feeling like I should ask her out. There was just something about watching her with Diego and Antonio that became a real turn on for me. Like if I had met her first, these’d be her kids and not, well, Becky’s.
I built up the courage to ask her out, but I balked a couple of times until she stopped me after feeding the kids and sat me down on the bed.
“Sergio,” Nina said, “you look like you wanna ask me something, so go ahead. Just ask me.”
I gulped. I was nervous. I couldn’t even find the right words, so I just kind of blurted it out, “Nina, I watch you with the boys and I see you all the time and I was wondering if, maybe, you’d like to, I don’t know….but, you know…”
“Are you asking me out, sugar?” Nina said.
“Um… yeah,” I said sheepishly.
“I never thought you’d ask. Sure, we’ll give it a try.” Nina said.
I wasn’t sure about the words “give it a try,” but I guess that’s better than a no. So we went out. And it went well. Very well, actually.